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The Anti-Post-Modernist Oath

Steve Smith of the Edmonton Oilers, after having scored in his own net, 1986-April-30

1) Introduction

Since not all readers of this web site come from Canada, I must explain the picture at the top of this article. Any not-so-young ice hockey lover has instantly recognized that picture, and many will even remember the date (1986-April-30) and the circumstances (seventh and last game of the Stanly Cup semi-finals, between the Edmonton Oilers and the Calgary Flames). Poor Steve Smith of the Oilers was trying to clear the puck out of his zone, but he missed and bounced the puck off the back of his goaltender's leg, and into his own net. To make things worse, no other goal was scored that night, and the Oilers lost the Cup because of that goal.

What's the connection with the state of the Catholic Church these days? What's the connection between that infamous goal and Pope Benedict XVI?

2) Hockey pucks are simple. So are wolves.

Governing the Church is not easy, and the Pope must deal with many difficulties. On the other hand, there is at least one thing which is very easy to do: distinguishing between wolves and sheep. Any Pope can expose all the wolves with amazing ease, if he wants to...

Indeed, all the Pope needs to do is set up two "nets" on a "skating rink", then give a "puck" to each player on his team, and tell him to go shoot that puck in the net of his choice: either the Catholic Church's net, or Satan's net. Of course, you don't need a real hockey rink! Rather, you need a pen, and an Oath.

This Oath must of course be appropriate. It must be drafted in such a way that wolves will refuse to sign it, because signing it would be like scoring in their own goal. The content of this Oath must therefore change with the theological fashions of the day.

For example, these days, even the worst heretics are convinced that Jesus was a great healer. In the same way, one hundred or even fifty years ago, if you had proposed an Oath that said: "Sodomites don't have a right to marry", everybody would have laughed at you, since even heretics in those days would have agreed to say sodomy is a sexual deviation. We therefore have to write up this Oath by chosing, among all the teachings of the Chruch, those which cause the most teeth-gnashing among contemporary wolves.

Let's try to write up such an Oath. Since the last one was called the "Antimodernist Oath" (Pius X, 1910), and that one of the most detrimental errors these days is Post-modernism, let's call this new oath the:

3) Anti-Post-Modernist Oath

I [your name] firmly embrace and accept each and every definition that has been set forth and declared by the unerring teaching authority of the Church, especially those principal truths which are directly opposed to the errors of this day.

First, Jesus Christ is God, and Jesus Christ founded one and only one Church, which is the Catholic Church, and His Vicar here on earth is infallible when he speaks ex cathedra on dogma and morals.

Second, any direct abortion is an abominable crime, and it's impossible to be pro-choice and to be Catholic.

Third, the soul of Judas is in Hell, as well as many others.

Fourth, any State, even so-called "democratic and pluralistic", must found its Laws on God and the Natural Law, as it is infallibly interpreted by the Catholic Church.

Fifth, sodomy is a mortal sin and a gravely bad act, and marriage can only be between one heman and one woman.

Sixth, despite the few truths which it contains, Islam is a lie.

Seventh, no Priest has the right to fiddle with the Liturgy. Moreover the majority of Masses must be said in Latin, ad orientem during the Eucharistic Prayer, and with kneeling communion on the tongue. (Strictly speaking, these are not articles of Faith, but the necessity of obeying the Pope is one. Moreover, wolves hate the common language of the Church, as well as any gesture of reverence toward Jesus really and substantially present in the Eucharist.)

I promise that I shall keep all these articles faithfully, entirely, and sincerely, and guard them inviolate, in no way deviating from them in teaching or in any way in word or in writing. Thus I promise, this I swear, so help me God.

4) Conclusion

Steve Smith, the player you can see here above on his knees on the skating rink, is famous for another reason on top of having scored in his own net. Indeed, after that game, he bitterly cried in front of all journalists, because hurting his own team made him suffer so much.

Compare this healthy reaction with that of some "Catholic" Priests and Bishops when they will read this Anti-Post-Modernist Oath. They too will weep and moan, but at the idea of scoring in Satan's net!

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